Chapter 7: The Shit Hit The Fan

IMG_5713or the wall…

After further encouragement by the producer and chef to think outside the box, I was relieved they served a plate with a couple of innocent -looking cookies. The chef insisted in piping the chocolate onto the plate and have the cookies standing up instead of flat down. When one of the cookies fell during the “beauty shot,” he huffed, puffed, and marched back into the kitchen to fix them. Once he returned, he placed the cookie platter in front of me, piped the chocolate, and explained. “In prison, we often had riots. The prisoners would throw feces against the wall or use it to write. I’ve seen just about everything written and drawn on the walls, even swastikas. What I’d like you to do is to use your finger or the knife to draw anything you like with the chocolate ganache.”

What I thought: OK. I can do dessert. These cookies can’t be harmful, can they? I’ll play along and then get out of here. Oh, they are stuffed with marshmallow. Harmless. It looks like supermarket FLUFF. I sense a theme here. That’s what all of this is…FLUFF. Feces? What? Here we go again. Oh my God! Seriously? Smile. You are almost done. It’s chocolate. Just enjoy, show delight and not shock. They want disgust? I will give them joy. 

What I said and did: I drew a heart on the cookie with the chocolate. When he asked why, I said I felt the world needed more love nowadays, “don’t you think?” I looked up and calmly smiled again. I guess it’s not what he expected. Once again he tried to rattle me by asking me to “spread the feces on the cookie,” to which I replied “You mean, chocolate ganache?” and offered him some.

  • BACK TO:

Chapter 1: The Pitch

Chapter 2: The Meeting & Introduction

Chapter 3: Amuse Bouche 1, 2, & 3

Chapter 4: The First Blow & Some Fish Tales

Chapter 5: Shit Show

Chapter 6: I Eat Dead People


Chapter 8: The Review

Chapter 9: Discovery & Final Thoughts